“Q”: I’VE STARTED TALKING TO THIS GUY WHO I’VE KNOWN FOR A WHILE. HE TREATS ME NICE BUT MY LAST RELATIONSHIP ENDED BAD & MAKES IT HARD FOR ME TO TRUST HIM. HOW DO I KEEP MYSELF FROM TALKING MYSELF OUT OF A GOOD THING?
“A”: Wowowowowow when I tell you I relate! I CAN RELATE! I honestly run from the thought of being happy because I’ve been scared with the fact that things may go wrong and I may end up hurt, so I run as a defense mechanism…. I’m not proud of it, but it’s something I’ve challenged myself to work on.
NOW the difference between you and I is that you have someone there for you, I DON’t! Soooo I’m ultimately not ready to take the step I’m about to tell you do take…
But If I was in your position, I would say EXPRESS exactly THAT of what you’re feeling! So sit down and express to him that you are hurting and are having a hard time letting go of your past. Express that you enjoy him and appreciate his efforts, BUT you need his help to get you to the place you aspire to be with him and within yourself!! (which is to ultimately trust him entirely and trust yourself wholeheartedly)
Meaning change comes from taking a chance and it’s time you took that chance on yourself and trusted him enough to give him a chance to show you that he can be what you need to overcome your trials….
Be open and honest. Set goals you wish to achieve within your progress and the reminders you need to stay the trust course. It’s not going to be easy soooo be sure to do what you need to do to release you from the hold your past currently has on you. Try finding a hobby to help take your mind off of things, for instance, do your hair, read a book, say your prayers, make a bucket list, go biking!!! There are hundreds of things for you to do! I personally knit! I love it! It allows me to concentrate on something besides whats bothering me… Try it!!!
—-KEEP in MIND that you opening up to him, will also be the TEST you use to calculate whether or not he should stay in your life or not, because if he can’t be there for you at your worst and support you, then he definitely doesn’t deserve you at your best.—-
ALL OF THIS WILL BE A TEST, for him and especially a test for YOU!! STOP believing that you aren’t worth it! You are! You got this! Just believe!!!
